Msn.com's 9 Natural Fertility Boosters

http://healthyliving.msn.com/pregnancy-parenting/advice/9-natural-fertility-boosters-2#1

1. Limit caffeine consumption to less than 300 mg a day (less than 50 mg per day if trying IVF).  According to the article, an average 8 oz cup of coffee has 100-130 mg of caffeine.

2. If you’re overweight, lose weight.

3. If you’re underweight, gain weight.

4. Try acupuncture.

5. Walk 30 minutes per day.  The article claims it helps increase circulation to the pelvis and reproductive organs.

6. Deal with depression.

7. Eat a balanced diet.

8. Strictly limit alcohol consumption.

9. Stop smoking and avoid second-hand smoke.

Who knows…I hope something on this list is helpful for someone who reads it.  The one thing I’ll take away from it is a reminder to limit my caffeine consumption.  Even though I only drink one cup of coffee per day and never drink soda, this one will encourage me to make sure I’m using half-caff and decaf more often :).  Can't hurt, right?

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            Can I just be honest that sometimes God confuses me? Do you think less of me because I said that? I think people are often afraid to share those thoughts...afraid that it will make their faith seem weak or that they won't look as "holy" in the eyes of others. Well, look at me as you must today because I admit it - I'm confused. I'm confused about why God continues to allow this journey to motherhood to be so hard for me. On one hand, I know that He is using this bumpy road to help mature my faith and reach out to others. Just last week, He blessed me with the opportunity to be there for a good friend who was dealing with her own miscarriage (and I do count that as a true blessing); however, thinking about the fact that this road continues to endure for me and Steve and how long it might last still confuses me. I'm confused about why my body seems to have become more uncooperative lately. Aunt Flo has become fickle and I've had weird pains that I haven't experienced before. But I also realize that these new symptoms should allow me to qualify for my insurance company to cover the cost of a laparoscopy that my doctor and I discussed to verify we haven't missed any structural issues in my body. So I think the symptoms were a blessing in disguise...they've allowed me to more easily take a step forward in my journey, but experiencing them has been confusing and frustrating nonetheless. I'm confused when I hear of people "accidentally" getting pregnant. Why is it that they can fall backwards into something without even looking and I can't even get there with guidebooks, a navigation system, and a determination that would stand up to just about anything? I'll be honest...on this one I still haven't come across anything to ease my feelings of confusion.
            So that's the raw truth today, my friends - I'm confused. But I'm strong in my faith and a little confusion is not going to shake who I know God to be. I think it's ok that we are confused or have questions sometimes. Experiencing feelings of confusion doesn't shake my faith that He does has a plan for me and that His plan is far better than one I could come up with on my own (even if I am a pretty excellent planner in most areas of my life ;) ). Experiencing feelings of confusion means I'm human - imperfect and impatient. And I'm pretty sure that Jesus came down to Earth to give faith and hope to us imperfect and impatient humans by bridging a gap we would never be able to bridge on our own...

Lyndee's story

                This past week was back to school week 2012 - always a little crazy and it didn't really give me a chance to write a new post so I'm taking this opportunity to share another story of a courageous and strong woman that was shared with me.  No need to pick a name of a brave literary character this time.  Her name really is Lyndee and this is her story...
 
               My husband and I have always known we wanted to have kids. In fact, it was a necessity when we were looking for each other. We both used it as a screening for potential future spouses.
                For me, the desire to be a mom started in my childhood. I was 8 when my youngest brother was born and my mom suffered from serious postpartum depression. As a result, I became a second mom to my little brother. I remember feeding, dressing, bathing, and playing with him. I also changed his diapers and helped in any other way I could. I loved it. As a teenager, I baby-sat kids.  One little boy, I would watch for 12 hours sometimes because his parents both worked and his mom was finishing nursing school. Again, he became like my own child. I am still close to his family and in fact, my husband and I are godparents to that little boy and his brother and sister.
                I always envisioned becoming a mom. I have always wanted kids. In fact, I became a teacher and am surrounded by kids all day during the school year. When I was a child and would picture my future family, I envisioned it, not around a husband, but around kids. Unfortunately, I was so focused on school that I didn’t spend much time dating. I finally met my husband while I was in grad school and we were engaged three months later. We got married in July 2009 with the agreement that we would wait two years before trying for kids.
                However, I got antsy and pushed for trying sooner. He finally relented and in March of 2011, I finished my birth control and we started trying. For the first few months, I wasn’t worried. I knew it could take healthy couples up to a year, but I really thought that by 6 months, we would be pregnant. We weren’t. I tried everything I could think to make it better. I took my temperature and used Ovulation Predictor Kits to determine when I was ovulating. We timed intercourse perfectly. I would lie afterwards with a pillow under my bottom. We tried the positions most recommended for conceiving. We bought Pre-Seed and used it.
                When we had tried for 11 months, I called to make an appointment with an OBGYN. He tested my husband. He was fine. He also did an HSG test on me. Nothing was blocked. Finally he put me on Clomid. I have been on it for three months.
                Every month, the depression I felt got worse. At first I would cry for an hour when I got my period. That slowly turned into several hours and then a day. Then I would be depressed for a few days. It was horrible for both me and my husband. My husband was very patient with me, but eventually he said, “I feel like you have given me so much happiness and you have only been miserable with me.” That broke my heart, but as much as I wanted to reassure him that he would be enough, I just couldn’t. I knew that if I never had kids, I would feel cheated. Why can so many others do it so effortlessly, but we have put such work into it and gotten nothing in return?
                I was slowly becoming miserable all the time. I hated going to work, because there were so many kids around. I hated spending time with my family, because they all told me I just needed to relax. How can you relax when you want something so badly and there is nothing you can do to get it? I hated watching television, because it seemed someone was pregnant or had small children on every show. I was so fixated and life was becoming a nightmare.
                I have been a Christian since I was a small child. I was raised to trust that God would give us what we needed and we needed to be patient and trust Him to provide. But it seemed God no longer cared. I begged him to listen and send us what we wanted so desperately. I cried and pleaded for hours at a time. I would have given anything, or so I thought, just to have that baby I had always wanted.
                Then in May of 2012 our world changed. My husband went to the doctor and came home with a diagnosis of cancer. It was melanoma, but the tumor was so large, they wanted to check his lymph nodes to be sure it hadn’t spread. June 15, we got the news we never expected. The cancer was in the lymph node they took, meaning it had spread beyond the skin. Now it was serious. They would need to go in and remove all the lymph nodes under his arm. If it was in more than 2 more lymph nodes, the prognosis was not good. My husband would have about a 50/50 chance of surviving 5 more years.
                Suddenly my life was shattered. How many 27 year olds have to face the possibility of becoming a widow? And I began to pray and plead yet again. But this time for God to spare my husband. I made him a deal I thought I would never make. “Please save my husband’s life. Let us grow old together and you can take away any chance of us ever having kids together. Just let him be okay.”
                My husband went in for surgery a week later and a week after that, we had our results. The rest of his lymph nodes were clear. Now his prognosis is around 80% for 5 years. We’re currently getting ready for him to start a clinical trial.
                I still want kids. I want them as much as I want air to breathe, but I would make that prayer again in a heartbeat. I would trade all my potential children for just 5 more years with my husband. And I mourn that year I spent being miserable. I could have been enjoying time with my husband when he was healthy. I could have appreciated the wonderful spouse God gave me instead of screaming at him for not giving me the children I wanted.
                Maybe we will have children someday. Maybe we won’t. With the medical bills we have from my husband for past and future treatments, I doubt we will ever be able to afford the more invasive treatments like IVF. But it doesn’t matter so much anymore. I guess it’s really all about perspective. And mine is forever altered by what could have been.

                To Lyndee herself - as we both returned to work this past week, I thought of you often.  Thank you again for allowing me to share your story.  And to anyone else who would be willing to share your story, please email me at jealousoffertilemyrtle@gmail.com.

Aunt Flo has become fickle

                For the last two cycles my period has been late with no explanations and no pregnancy either time :/.  5 days late the first time, 3 days the second.  If you've been trying or tried to conceive for any amount of time, you can understand the kind of back and forth emotions that could come along with a late period.  It's like you're waiting to pick up a family member at the airport.  You do your preparations: verify their flight arrival time, clean out the passenger seat of your car (at least I know I would have to take that step...some of you may take better care of your vehicles), leave the house with plenty of time to make it to the airport, and make sure to have your cell phone ready so that they can call you when they arrive.  But then you arrive and you're stuck circling the airport because you haven't heard from them yet.  So you decide to park the car and go inside to check if their flight has been delayed.  No delay or cancellation notices, no phone calls - so what the heck is going on?!  That's what a late period when you're trying to conceive feels like...a frustrating, unexplained delay.  A cancellation notice would mean a positive pregnancy test so you'd be thrilled to get that as your answer.  But no cancellation notices here (trust me, I checked...and checked...and checked one more time just to make sure).  I guess my Aunt Flo just decided to roam around the airport doing some duty free shopping when her plane first landed without telling me.  And then she finally comes walking out.  She's later than I expected, but she arrives all the same.
                When Steve and I first got married, I breathed a sigh of relief every month when I would get my period.  (Come on ladies, don't act like you didn't do it too ;) - I've had plenty of friends who have expressed the same thoughts to me!)  But now, instead of being relieved that I'm a young newlywed whose birth control seems to be working well, I struggle with feelings of disappointment the day my not-so-dear Aunt Flo comes to visit.  And since she's decided to throw me for a loop with her fickle ways the last couple months, I'm even more annoyed with her than usual.

                Lord - Thank you that you have a plan for Steve and me.  Thank you that you know the paths that lie ahead and that you walk with me every step of the way.  Although at times I may become frustrated when a rock falls into my path, I will keep my eyes focused on you and the wonderful gifts you have for me in my life.  I hold steadfastly to your word that you work all things for my good and can't wait to see the future you have in store for our family.

"I see pregnant people..."

                Anyone else ever noticed the phenomenon where you start seeing the car you just purchased everywhere around you?  Never really took notice of it before, but once you start driving it you realize how many of them are actually on the road?  Well…pretty sure it’s like that with pregnant women or new moms when you’re trying to conceive!  I obviously can’t take notice of other women who are also trying to conceive (it’s not like we wear a sign around or anything), but boy does it seem like I will hone in on any pregnant woman or baby in a car seat within a 50 foot radius.  I was at a store on vacation last week and, while waiting in line to check out, I immediately noticed two pregnant women and one new mom (she had an adorable little girl sitting in the cart while she loaded the conveyor belt) among the people in my close proximity.  I think most women tend to notice cute babies around, but I don’t really remember taking extra notice of pregnant women until my husband and I started trying to conceive.  But now that I desire to have a rounded belly of my own (probably the only time in life people ever think "I wish I had a bigger belly"), it's all I can think about when I see a pregnant woman.  As if I didn't think about it enough already...

Oh, and yes, the title of this post is a reference to The Sixth Sense ;).